Blue and Red make Purple

If red pills are reality and truth and blue pills are ignorance and lies then purple pills are somewhere between that. There are purple pills. One such pill I am finding hard to swallow now is the purple pill of forgiveness. Forgiveness is a gift and therefore, purple pills can only be given out to others. It is given to cure a wound of someone else but it doesn't always cure your own ills especially if you have taken a lot of red pills in your life. Imagine a situation where someone has wronged you. They want forgiveness, you want to give it, so you reach into your pocket and hand them a purple pill. They understand the reality of the situation but are soothed by the illusion that everything is better. That works for them, but what of you? Saying you are not hurt would be taking the blue pill, enraging from the hurt would be taking the red pill.

The fact is that there are no pills to cure the reality of hurt and pain. It is the human condition to measure our life by the amount of pain we endure. The destructive nature of my chosen medicine has consumed me. Though i hand out purple pills like candy to children, I am not cured of my reality. I have only the promise that my pain will subside and the measure of my life will be weighed greater. I struggle each day to face the plain and simple fact that I can forgive without healing my wounds. This is not martyrdom it is masochism: pleasure in being abused or dominated : a taste for suffering.

I can't say this fully, because i fail to see the pleasure. I do, however, keep handing out purple pills for every occasion. I will keep these precious jewels on hand for the next time I am wronged, and I will be sure to neglect my personal healing. I am forced to do this often, because many times the healing process conflicts with the illusional description of true forgiveness. "I am angry" doesn't reflect " I forgive you". Suffice it to say, each time I hand out a purple pill, my heart dies a little and these days the once vibrant joyful heart i had is beginning to look like a broken shard of obsidian.

Do not cry for me. Do not fear the death of a mans soul. Do not concern yourself with a dark heart which once was whole, for there is a cure. The cure is in your left pocket. Just remember one thing, my friends. The cure is a purple pill...

....and purple pills can only be given to others.